Short + Sweet – Yorkshire

Now here’s a global event you have probably never heard of. Forget the T20 World Cup – if only we could – this is a competition between creatives in various categories to see who walks off with the plaudits of their own communities. The USP is that the performances can only last a maximum of ten minutes.

The venue was St Wilfrid’s Church Hall in Harrogate, which had also been used for the two heats resulting in nine entries making it to this final. The judging is a combination of appointed arbiters and an audience vote, a bit like Strictly Come Dancing, except without the sequins – and the dancing – and the tears – and the glitter ball. In fact, not much like Strictly at all really.

There were presentations varying from monologues, comedies, straight dramas and one piece difficult to pigeon-hole, which seemed to appeal to the audience’s sense of humour but had my mind straying to an impending hernia operation for some light relief. I thought for a moment that I may have moved to the wrong town twelve years ago, but the wine was only £3 a glass from the temporary bar so that might have been it.

Fiona Georgiou Hunt

The evening was compèred by Festival Director, Fiona Georiou Hunt, who explained that Short and Sweet originated in Sydney, Australia, as did her accent. She told us, as if we needed reminding, that Australians are competitive and so it was only fitting that the national ethos be applied to the arts. They have even gatecrashed the Eurovision Song Contest now. Although this evening was devoted to the theatre, a look at their website will reveal that there are sections covering dance, voices, song, cabaret, film, ‘fast and fresh’ and ‘other’. It also shows – every pun intended – that forthcoming events are being held in South Africa, Australia, India, Dubai and Viet Nam.

Formalities over, it was time for the fun to begin.

The first presentation was called Curtains, written by Jonathan Skinner, Director Meg Terzza, starring Izzy Smith and Abdul Rahman Chunara. It was a two-hander between a cyclist, Rochelle, and a chap who works in a chippie, Vinny – I do hope his surname was Ghar. They have found themselves in a space behind a pair of curtains, a play on words, and, although strangers, they get talking. Neither knows how they got there but, as they tell their stories, they realise that their last memories could indicate they are in purgatory, she having been hit by a train on a level crossing and he being stabbed by a late-night customer after a row about his order.

It sounds pretty depressing, but was highly amusing and the interplay between the characters became more intimate as they got to know each other better. A great start to the evening.

Izzy Smith and Abdul Rahman Chunara in Curtains.

The second play, Sirens, could not have been in sharper contrast, being a dystopian picture of Harrogate after rising tides had turned it into an island in an archipelago. It was written by Rachael Halliwell, who also played the part of Sula, who inhabits the town alone but has become the object of pilgrimage for people on other islands as she has managed to survive. Debbie Phillips is Ceri, a girl seeking inspiration and Naail Ishaq, her boyfriend who has accompanied her. It was a dark, moody piece and very evocative. The Directors were Ellen Carnazza and Amie Burns Walker. ITC All Points North.

Rachel Halliwell and Debbie Phillips

Next up was Maud’s Game, full of twists and turns about a couple of women who meet in the queue at a coffee shop. Maud, Jenn Murgatroyd, is a somewhat elderly lady complete with shopping trolley, who blags a latte ‘is that a milky coffee?’ and a piece of cake from Alison, played by Jayne Domingo, a manager grabbing a drink in her lunch hour. All is not as it seems and this confused and lonely silver-haired lady ends up costing the, supposedly smart, Alison far more than a Java. The Writer was Rachel Gregory and the Director, Anthony Kirkland.

Jenn Murgatroyd, Maud and Jayne Domingo, Alison. You will be seeing her again several times more!

The fourth item on the agenda was Lead Me To The Weird Places, Written, Directed and Performed by Joel Dean and Adam Ekin-Goodlad. ITC The Jamheds. To be honest, I don’t think that they need any leading. Two maxims spring to mind here; humour, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder and if you can’t find anything good to say about someone, don’t say anything at all. So, moving right along….

Joel Dean and Adam Ekin-Goodlad – not necessarily in the order, but could be.

Another juxtaposition here. After Lead Me To The Weird Places we have the best piece of the evening in Brain Freeze. It was written by Barry Wood and is a beautifully crafted short play which manages to have a beginning, a middle and an end, culminating in a great twist, which I didn’t see coming until just before the big reveal. The Director, Chris Rawson, had the cast perfectly in harmony and the presentation was worthy of a half-hour piece rather than ten minutes.

It is about a dodgy cryogenics company who operate on the cheap, knowing that it will be so long before cures are found for the various fatal diseases, that they will never need to enliven the corpses. That being the case, they save money by disposing of the cadavers and keeping a token head in deep freeze, informing their clients’ relatives that the brain is the only organ needed to complete the future process of reanimation. Actually, even the head was a cabbage so no maintenance required.

Tom, Michael Garside, is the sleazy owner who passes the day practising his putting in the office, whilst his hapless manager, Jack, played by Ed Simpson, deals with the business. Everything is going well until Emma, Rebecca Evans, turns up to reclaim the head of her father as she has realised that no cure for his illness will ever be found and so wants to give him a decent funeral. The problem is that the father’s records have been wiped from the computer and the paperwork has gone missing, presumably shredded.

I will not reveal the ending in case it is performed somewhere else, it certainly deserves to be, in fact it won two awards on the night, Best Director, Chris Rawson and Best Actor, for Ed Simpson.

Ed Simpson, Michael Garside and Rebecca Evans

After an interval came a piece called Taking Care Of The New Lad in which a prison officer recalls the advice given to him when he first took up post. Although a two-hander it spent about eight of the ten minutes as a monologue with a prisoner, Carrick, Robert King, sitting expressionless in a chair whilst the officer, Doyle, Chris Wall, recalled how he was told to be careful and never divulge any personal details to the inmates. After one minor slip of the tongue, Carrick, the apparent king of the cons, revealed just how much he knew about the life of Doyle, leading to his corruption and exploitation. It started off fairly innocently but then cranked up the tension to a satisfying denouement. Chris Wall walking away with an award for his efforts.

Robert King, Writer and Director, as Carrick and Chris Wall, Doyle

How could I possibly not like a play with the title One Night Stan? It comprised three actors recalling their encounter with a chap called Stan, who he had arranged to meet after engaging with them on various social media sites. Ah! those were the days. The rendezvous was the same Italian restaurant which made me think the writer, Adam Szudrich, had been reading my diary from 2002. It transpired that the trattoria belonged to his mother-in-law who was trying to help him overcome the premature death of her daughter, by vetting the women on his behalf. Although there were three actors involved, there was no interaction between them, each recalling their experience of every stage to no one in particular, apparently thinking out loud. As the musings progressed we found out more about the women, who had totally different reasons for becoming involved with the eponymous hero, and their hopes, needs and foibles. The Directior, Anthony Kirkland, elicited every ounce of humour and pathos from the situation.

Rachel, played by Jayne Domingo, was just out after a good time, as long as the meal didn’t include carbs as she didn’t want to affect her Insta pictures. The down-to-earth Holly, Lisa Morton was in the market for a long-term meaningful relationship while Marie, Cassie McClintock, was hoping for more of a career advancement, her invitation coming via LinkedIn. Once again, the ending was satisfying although this time more predictable.

Rachel, Jayne Doningo: Holly, Lisa Morton and Marie, Cassie McClintock.

The penultimate offering, Obsess, written and directed by Lucy Gillespie, was much darker, being the story of Adam, a young man, played by Abdul Rahmen Chunara, who is trying to end his relationship with Max, his personal trainer, whom he met chatting on-line. It had become toxic after the latter is discovered to be a control freak and won’t let go. As the play’s title suggests, Max, James Riley, is obsessed with Adam even though he only seems to want to change him into something he isn’t. The tension is palpable and conveyed superbly well by the actors, who I thought may come to blows at any time. It was one of only two presentations which didn’t contain a humorous element so the contrast made it even more shocking than had it been a stand alone play.

Abdul Rahmen Chunara as Adam and James Riley as Max.

Finally, a bit of light relief from Jeremy Walsh-Harrington, who wrote, directed and performed the last piece, ‘Alan Benut’s’ Love of Hair. That’s just plain showing off! The presentation was a relaxed monologue with Mr Walsh-Harrington, sitting in a chair reading a spoof diary of someone who looked suspiciously like Alan Bennett. The voice was rather reminiscent too.

He was a man facing up to his demise and ruminating on the possibility of an afterlife. Should there be such a thing his wish was to come back as a bottle of hair product used by Melvyn Bragg! I presume that this would be an everlasting container of Head and Shoulders as a normal size would probably not see the week out, with his Lordship’s copious locks to cleanse.

The style of delivery was very authentic, relying on a lot of references to the great man’s work, but I thought that a couple of the double entendres, or even single entendres, were more fitting for a Carry On film than a Bennett diary, but it was funny and a great way to end the night. The judges and audience obviously thought so too, as he was given the award for Best Script.

Jeremy Walsh-Harrington with my award for best supporting syrup!

After the performances had been completed we were treated to a selection of songs from Jayne Domingo, I told you she cropped up regularly, and Anthony Kirkland. This gave the organisers a chance to count the votes and confer with the judges. It also allowed me to get another three quid’s worth of vin rouge.

Jayne Domingo and Anthony Kirkland

Being a virgo, my love of symmetry was satisfied by Fiona Georgiou Hunt, who returned to read the results and sum up the evening by thanking those involved, namely the production team of Chris Wall, Michelle Rudek, and her husband, Anthony Georgiou, as well as the lighting technicians Richard Corfield and Luke O’Rourke.

She went on to say that Short and Sweet are always on the lookout for writers, actors and directors to participate in the events which, as already stated, are held world-wide so, should you be a creative or just want to go and watch those who are, please go to https://shortandsweet.org/ where you can find out more about the organisation and pending productions. While you are there why not sign up to the newsletter so you don’t miss out on anything.

The thing I will take away from this event is that there is an amazing amount of talent in this part of the world in all sectors of theatre. I was also touched by the camaraderie between those taking part. You will see that several people appear in multiple productions to make sure that they could be given an airing. Altruism at its best.

I am no theatrical coach but I would just like to pass on a piece of advice, which is, that when you are called on stage to receive an award, pause for a second and accept the applause rather than make a quick exit. I would have loved to have had some photographs of your triumphs. There is no need for the full-on Oscar gush but a few seconds in the limelight are more than well deserved.

The event was presented in partnership with Harrogate Theatre https://www.harrogatetheatre.co.uk/

Harrogate Film Society https://www.harrogatefilmsociety.org/ and

The Writers’ Collective https://writerscollective.co.uk/

Feature image from Short and Sweet

Photographs by Stan Graham